Why Everyone’s Winning on Instagram Except You
Why Everyone’s Winning on Instagram Except You
I don’t care if you’re a full-time creator, a mom of three just trying to make it through the end of the year, or a Gen-Z’er scrolling between finals and Friendsgiving, bc this one’s for everyone who touches social media during the holidays.
Every year, around this time of the year, like clockwork, we get hit with the same scroll cycle :
🎄 The perfectly decorated tree and twinkle-light living room
🎁 The 27 “Gift guides for the girl who has everything”
🛩️ The “surprise” trip to Aspen (that was definitely planned since June of last year)
And before we know it, what started as a cute holiday inspo moment turns into a full-blown comparison crisis.
“Should I be decorating more and posting about it???”
“Why aren’t (more) brands reaching out to me to do holiday campaigns?!!?!”
“Why does everyone’s life look like a Hallmark movie while mine looks like a CVS receipt?!!!”
The sad truth here is that the holidays amplify this “my life is fabulous” illusion. Everyone’s trying to outshine each other… the décor, the brand deals, the matching pajamas with the kids (and the two adopted dogs), the charitable donations, the vibe. Forget “Keeping Up With The Kardashians”, this is the annual “Keeping Up With The Joneses” olympics, and social media is the main stage.
And I know first hand that creators feel it extra hard. It’s something that always comes up this time of the year with my students. Because somewhere along the way creators stopped celebrating the actual season, and made it only about performing even only subconsciously…
Performing joy.
Performing success.
Performing gratitude.
This is the dark side of the “merry & bright” season which we use to all love, cherish, and look forward to.
We’ve built an economy where your self-worth (and dare I say sometimes your income) feels directly tied to how festive your feed looks. And besides it being utterly exhausting, it’s also FAKE AS FUCK.
So before you burn out trying to make your holidays look like a Pinterest board, I want you to try this:
Audit Your Feed:
Mute the people who trigger the “I should be doing more” voice. Curate for peace, not perfection. I did this earlier this year and it was something I was stalling on because I felt rather guilty doing it. “C’mon Idalia.. really? Toughen up.” was the mindset I used to have. Now I’m like “Hmmmm, love them and what they do but right now it’s not feeing my soul. Time to mute.”Redefine Productivity:
The holidays aren’t for “show”, they’re for reflection. And remember as strong women as you all are, you don’t have to earn your rest. This probably has been my biggest lesson of 2025. You should recharge your batteries BEFORE they’re empty. Being a Latina in the USA with immigrant parents, the thought of rest was a mortal sin. Now in my early 40s it’s a priority.Disconnect to Reconnect
Yeah gurl, turn off that damn phone when you’re with your loved ones. Real memories > Reels. Let the moment breathe without needing to capture it. Dani and I have a no-phone rule while we eat dinner. Something as simple as that can really go a long way.
So as we roll our way through the holidays, allow me to give you a gentle reminder that you’re human. That you deserve a season that feels peaceful, not performative.
If this hit home, subscribe to my SubStack. Part 2 is my holiday love letter to every creator who’s ever felt like they had to “keep up” just to stay relevant.
Let this be your reminder that joy isn’t a metric xx
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XX Idalia